my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
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He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
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20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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