GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
