hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
