Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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