All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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