ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I could fuck to npr.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
