Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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