spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
