its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
