evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always time for handjobs
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize