What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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