yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.