yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
is wine microwaveable?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize