You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize