I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize