It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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