i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
She announced her abortion via fbk
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
