Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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