Cold hands, warm shart.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
