Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
