yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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