im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i think my mom watched the whole time
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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