Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
did i just pee glitter
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
