I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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