sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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