That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
