the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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