Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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