I can tuck mytits in my pants
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
