I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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