I feel great
I just peed on a car
where am i from again
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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