another moral hangover. fuck.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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