I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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