no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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