shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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