Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
