I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
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