your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
