When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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