Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just googled if crying burns calories
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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