Please, let me fuck your mom
well you can't waste a boner
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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