Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
