Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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