So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
of course. lets lasso hookers.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
My feet surprised me
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