we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
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