We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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