susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
