But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
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2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
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I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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