ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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