Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize